The Trade Off
Any woman’s DMs are a scary place. From sexual advances to unsolicited opinions, online inboxes are generally cavernous caves of creeps. Recently, mine have been filled with entrepreneurial women looking for business partners.
What feels like a breath of fresh air from awkward compliments and “hey baby”s is really a different beast in disguise. I’ve swapped horny men for MLMs.
Ramping myself up to order another drink
What’s interesting is that these women are pitching something beyond supplements and hair care. In the last month, not one recruiter has told me that I simply must reach out to their main account.
The new wave is encouraging me to get into foreign exchange trading. When did the skinny tea bullies learn how to be stock market bulls?
When my Shein order fits
I Can Be Your Fantasy
My inbox is no stranger to multi-level marketing. Before ambassador programs, Monat, the hair product line that causes hair loss, was sending sentries to fix my fine hair. Former family friends would fall over themselves to offer me leggings, fitness programs, and special makeup deals on Facebook. Throughout my childhood, Tupperware parties and Arbonne reps were to be avoided at all costs.
Women have grown up dodging product-based sisterhoods at every turn. It’s a specific kind of enthusiasm - or maybe desperation - that we’ve learnt to sniff out a mile away. The stench of false promises.
We’ve honed these skills for good reason. As many as 99% of people who join MLMs lose money. For Monat, only 3% of members will ever reach Managing Market Partner status, a level that still only sees an annual income of approximately $2000. The rest continually fork out money to their senior members, hoping one day there will be enough people under them for the venture to be viable.
MLMs, despite being pyramid-shaped, are legal because they sell products. Pyramid schemes, which focus on financially trapping their members, do not. That said, there are workarounds. Many MLMs charge monthly membership fees for their sellers to keep active accounts. You gotta pay to play, and often those fees are the largest part of the company’s profits.
While sketchy, MLMs are a big industry. In Canada, they generate $3.5 billion of sales revenue a year. The system works, and new companies pop up online (and in my DMs) every day. Each one is aiming to be more enticing than the last.
To keep recruitment high, MLMs are manufactured to prey on a few key demographics. They boast flexible schedules, a “be your own boss” rally cry, minimal start-up costs, and discounts on beauty products. They know these perks will specifically appeal to women. Namely, moms wanting to stay home and military spouses having difficulty establishing roots. Of the approximately 19 million Americans working in multi-level marketing, 74% are women.
As part of the deal, MLMs offer “an upline of sponsors” who are there to support the launch of “your” new business. It’s pitched, in part, as a sisterhood - a love pyramid of sorts. If you’ve ever wanted to be a #BossBabe or SheEO, now you have a connected web to help you.
The product “family” and social events are a huge element in recruiting and maintaining members. Monat had its Las Vegas reunion earlier this month. Some attendees were so desperate to show off the good time that they lied about Lady Gaga performing. It seems sad, but I get it. Having spent years isolating, having a group of ladies supporting me through my career, side projects, and day-to-day sounds amazing. Wouldn’t you do whatever you could to banish loneliness?
What multi-level marketing is selling isn’t about the products. They are selling a fantasy about who you could be: the mom who has it all, the larger-than-life #girlboss, the successful socialite, and now, apparently, the fierce financial trader.
MLMs pretend to be fairy godmothers with the power to give you a new life. They pepper you with just enough magic to believe that it can happen. If you work hard, you could be at the top of the throne with everyone else, listening to a fake Lady Gaga perform at a conference. This is your rags to riches moment. And, while your carriage won’t turn into a pumpkin at midnight, your credit score might.
There’s a lot more to lose than a glass slipper.
“Hey Hun! I found this AMAZING new business opportunity….”
Bitch Better Have My Money
When one idea ceases to be viable, there’s always a new MLM waiting in the wings. These companies have learnt to shapeshift into new variations of the female dream. Like Tupperware-wolves.
We’ve all met one. We all know one.
The 'crypto-bro' is a special breed of douche that loves flaunting their knowledge of highly volatile stocks. After politicians, these are the most notorious mansplainers out there. Their pride directly stems from how early they were in on the crypto game, how much Joe Rogan they’ve listened to, and their regurgitated opinions on Space X.
Urban Dictionary offers this definition:
A young man on twitter who is an absolute hype beast for crypto-currencies and makes long-term predictions, often backed by memed and self-fulfilling financial charts.
Of all things to use as a personality marker, cryptocurrency might be the lamest and least original one out there. Nevertheless, the community stands strong. One article goes as far as to say “to the world, they’re crypto bros. To each other, a brotherhood.”
Gag.
Today, MLMs are trying to capitalize on that comradery. Being a crypto bad bitch is the new #girlboss fantasy, and the community has already proven itself to be strong.
Foreign exchange trading (FOREX) is all about trading currencies. The trading itself is perfectly legitimate, but the learning curve is steep. Despite what the crypto-bros are spewing, trading is not for novices. Many of my friends can’t even maintain a savings account. How could they possibly tackle currency trading?
Enter multi-level marketing.
MLMs have seen the success of crypto and have created banks of “expert knowledge” on how to get into the market. Notably, IM Master Academy (formerly iMarketsLive) operates as a hub for FOREX learning. Their website is convincing.
Have you ever felt like you were meant for more? What if there was a way for you to build a better life & experience more happiness & fulfillment?
Who hasn’t? None of us can claim we haven’t wanted money to flow easier. How many morons do I need to watch posting Shiba Inu memes until I get in on the game?
Since the Bitcoin boom, hundreds of trading academies have popped up online. They all guarantee that their tools will be the ones to launch you to the moon. Generally, these academies charge a monthly fee for their programming and access to courses. When you bring in other members, however, that fee is discounted. IM Master Academy offers commission for adding people to your downline or through affiliate programs.
The product is the educational tools, but your money is meant to come from trading. Of course, foreign exchange trading is challenging. There are entire industries dedicated to trades and trend forecasting that get it wrong all the time. The sheer amount of work to understand the market isn’t nearly as appealing as learning about legging inventory or snapping videos of your hair routine.
Moreover, the academy tools were never built to be useful. They claim to be arming consumers with practical tools, but, frankly, it’s not their problem if you win or lose. In fact, iMarketsLive was charged with violating registration requirements that safeguard consumers from fraud four years ago. They bounced back as IM Master Academy instantly, and seemingly haven’t skipped a beat. That’s because education is secondary to their main business model: membership.
The best way to make passive income with FOREX companies is to be a recruiter.
She is all of us
Brit-Coin
Despite the flurry of MLM activity, crypto and online investing are huge wins for women worldwide.
Bitcoin, the first blockchain-based cryptocurrency, has been around since January 2009. In 2017, it had a hot streak of price surges that brought it into the mainstream. Anyone who had invested early made a killing, and they weren’t shy to share their views on the future of our financial system.
Britney Spears was using Bitcoin as early as 2014 to hide transactions from her father and ex-conservator, Jamie Spears. For Britney, Bitcoin was a hidden network she could use to cling to her freedom in secret. Cryptocurrency allowed her to operate outside of Jamie's (and the court’s) control.
Besides Britney, not many women were quick to the crypto game. As of 2020, only 15% of bitcoin traders were women. In 2021, however, there was a 1400% boost of women in the market. Many joined the party after a Supreme Court ruling in March eliminated a ban on cryptocurrency in India. Women all over the country have been empowered to invest, and the data shows they’re doing so more aggressively than the average male user.
Get it, girls!
It’s not hard to see the appeal. Crypto eliminates the middlemen and red tape that used to be required to invest. Just take out your phone and you’re halfway there. A teller once asked me if I knew how the “tab” key worked, so I’m personally thrilled to stay out of the banks…
The quiet nature of crypto offers freedom to repressed segments of our population. Sadly, Britney isn’t the only woman forced under the control of a man. Many live as dependants, and crypto is providing a private, online way for them to gain financial freedom in secret.
It makes the ploys of FOREX academies that much more sinister.
Tossing someone’s manager on CC
Play Responsibly
Just because something is accessible, does not mean it is easy.
Despite its general success, the crypto market is still highly volatile. Loud supporters like Elon Musk have swayed prices with something as mindless as a tweet. The brotherhood is always keen to throw investments around for the greater good of the community. Last year they attempted to send Dogecoin "to the moon" and helped it soar in price by 800%.
The biggest issue with crypto and FOREX academies is that they promote risky financial behaviour. FOREX markets allow for high leverage, meaning it’s extremely easy to lose way more than you have. 50 times more, in some instances. Most brokers and financial planners would never recommend that the average person getting involved with foreign exchange trading. We’ve created a Robin Hood situation for something that is better left to the highly trained.
People continue in MLMs for that same reasons partners stay in harmful relationships. They've been sold on a lifestyle they want to make a reality, they're on the hook for whatever products they bought upfront, they've publicly committed to the brand, and they're bombarded with pressure from their upline. It's a toxic environment meant to exploit members in a (mostly) legal way, and it's devastating.
When you factor in FOREX, it’s a whole new level of irresponsible. The amount of money you could lose on hair products is infinitely less than what’s available to be lost in currency trading, and there aren’t any checks and balances for the educational products being sold. Monat has famously undergone lawsuits over the quality of their hair supplies. Since then, they’ve been outed as a scam, but have also come in line with FDA regulations.
Who do you call when your FOREX trade goes badly?
As annoying as it is being bombarded by desperate DMs, I empathize with the women on the other side. The girls you see doing TikTok dances about "working from their phones" and feeling #blessed have the odds stacked against them. They're struggling, and they're likely struggling alone.
All we can do is hope is that they sell their shares before the damage is too bad.
